Thursday, January 26, 2017

Thoughts for Thursday: You Know You're a Mom When...

I was talking with a girlfriend the other day and we were laughing at us going back-and-forth about the ways you know you're a mom. Now of course, you know you're a mom when you're the parent of an actual human {duh}, but these are funny little "-isms" I -- nor my friend -- didn't realize until that said tiny human was here. These are things "they" don't tell you before these babies are born, so I thought we could laugh at some of these in jest.



You Know You're a Mom When...

+ You know exactly what time "Curious George," "Mickey Mouse Clubhouse" and a myriad of other TV shows air. Friday night is movie night on the Disney Channel, so you best go record that movie so you don't have to fork over $30+ for the DVD of "The Lion King." 


+ You can sing verbatim the into songs to "Bubble Guppies," "Dora the Explorer," "Mickey Mouse Clubhouse," "Doc McStuffins..." and the list goes on and on. {Via my friend Liz

+ You get ready in stages. Shower before the baby wakes up? Apply makeup when he's down for a nap? Dry your hair around lunch? You better believe it. 


+ Your entire Instagram and Facebook sites are straight-up pictures of your kids and quotes from them. 

+ You consider waking up at 7:30 a.m. to be "sleeping in." {Via Liz

+ Animals become just that: animals. Everyone told me this wouldn't happen, but alas, our beloved Oliver {RIP you crazy cat} was just another mouth to feed, and while we loved him so, his title as "baby" was quickly captured by our eldest son, Walker. 


+ Your calendar looks something like this: 


  • Monday: Play Date with Jack/Pediatric Dentist after nap 
  • Tuesday: Mother's Day Out 
  • Wednesday: Bible Study/Park after nap with Jane
  • Thursday: Mother's Day Out 
  • Friday: Pediatrician appointment 
  • Saturday: Jenny's Birthday Party 
  • Sunday: Church

I'm telling you, your calendar becomes full of play dates, birthday parties, pediatrician appointments, pediatric dentist appointments and "school" when you become a mom. 

+ You laugh at your teenage brother telling you he's tired. Um, no. There is no tired like mom tired. Go enjoy another morning of sleeping in until 10 a.m., brother, and put a sock in it. 


+ You treasure the sacred hours of 2-4 p.m. otherwise known as "Nap Time." And how much you can get done during those blissful two hours. 


+ You want to punch anyone and everyone who rings the doorbell or knocks on the door during those sacred two hours. I may or may not have been known to say smartly: "Well, if you'd like to come rock them back to sleep, then by all means, please ring that doorbell again." 


+ You know all the hidden gems of both indoor and outdoor play places that, pre-children, you never knew even existed. Indoor play place at the mall? Never noticed it before! But you better believe my kids are all OVER that when it's time to hit up the Galleria. 


+ You make restaurant choices based on the children's menu and children's activities. My friend Liz and I pick the same certain restaurant every time our families go to dinner together because A) They give your kids dough to play with while you wait for the meal B) They bring the kids meals out first and C) They have a splash pad outside the restaurant where our kids can run wild post-meal. 


+ You base a concealer on its ability to cover dark under-eye circles from being up all night with your children. 


+ You go out to dinner with your husband and you spend half the time talking about your kid: why they aren't sleeping, why they're throwing crazy temper tantrums, how much you love them, and the latest, "He said _____ and it was so funny!" 


+ You dread a rainy, snowy or otherwise not-75-degrees-and-sunny day because you know what that means: cooped up in the house with the kids all day. AAAAAHHHH! 


+ You catch yourself saying things and getting excited about things you never would have pre-kids: "Don't lick the mirror," "Don't put your foot in your brother's mouth," "Please don't stick a Cheerio in your nose," "You did it! You went pee-pee in the potty! Great job!" 


+ You automatically cut up fruit, period. No lie, one time I wasn't thinking and accidentally cut up my husband's strawberries we were having for dessert into fourths. Whoops. 


+ You hold someone's baby and you catch yourself swaying back-and-forth. It's called the "Mom Sway" and it's so real. Bonus points if you pat said baby on the bottom as you sway. 


+ You have slept in your child's crib or bed with them, or on their floor of their room holding their hand through crib slats because, apparently, sleeping alone in a dark, quiet room is for the birds. 


+ You need coffee to start your day and wine to end it. As my friend Stacy said, "Coffee and grace keep you going. Coffee says, 'You can do it!' and wine says, 'You did it! On to the next." 




So, what moment hit you in the face and you said, "Yup, that was a total #momlife moment!"? 

*Please note these are all in jest. I love my two precious boys with all my heart and can't imagine my life without them in it. We just have to laugh sometimes, right?! 


**Linking up with Annie and Natalie 

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6 comments:

  1. YAS! I thought I was the only one who couldn't resist my child's pleas to climb in the crib with him. lol!

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  2. Amen to the tired comments from people who can sleep in all day Saturday if they so choose to haha. I thought of one yesterday as I was talking to the UPS man who came to the house. He seemed a little confused why I was chatting it up with him but in my mind I was all "you are the first adult I've seen in hours!!!"

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  3. GIRL YES TO ALL OF THESE 100%. I have had to refrain from smacking my 22 year old sister upside the head when she tells me she is tired or 'doesn't have time' to do things. And I totally have to schedule getting ready, and time basically all activities based on nap time/when I know the baby won't be hungry. Laughed reading this whole darn post!

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