Thursday, May 7, 2015

Thoughts for Thursday: How Being a Mom Changed Me

Before I became a mom, I didn't realize how easy I had it. I could go anywhere at the drop of a hat - without having to organize a babysitter {or pay for one, for that matter}. I could sleep in until 10 a.m. on a Saturday. I didn't find Cheerios on my car's floorboards. I didn't have to listen to "If You're Happy And You Know It" in the car on repeat during my 20-minute drive home from work - and actually pretend to like it when it came on for the 70th time. I could go out and have three glasses of wine with friends until 1 a.m. every Saturday night if I wanted to. And I definitely wasn't spending $40 on a pair of size 5 Stride-Rite Sauconys that would last a mere two months until they were outgrown. 

But do you see the resounding factor there? "I?" Being a mom has changed me so much, but especially in the "I" factor - it's no longer about me. It's about this tiny human that God has entrusted me with...one who will be grown up before I know it and will think singing "If You're Happy And You Know It" in the car is ridiculous while he's begging me to drop him off a block from school. 



Of course, there are many physical ways that being a mom changed me. I'm no longer a size 2, I have hips that I never had before and I hate that "goodbye arm" that occurs every time I frantically wave at someone. And sure, I could run a marathon or go to the gym to get it back to how it was pre-Walker, but how being a mom changed me is that - while physical fitness is so important - I would personally rather spend time chasing after Walker than sweating my butt off on an elliptical at the gym. {Totally not downing the gym here, folks. This is just my personal choice.}

But there's so much more to it than that. I realize that I'm in charge of this tiny little life, and that it's my job as his mother to, along with my husband, lead him to trust and follow Christ. Being a mother has changed my outlook on so much in regard to Walker: I cry at the drop of a hat now; I worry about almost everything {but seriously}; and I feel so much weight of the world on my shoulders to try and ensure it's never on his - and that I protect him from as much as I possibly can. 

There are so many things I wish I could tell my pre-mom self about what motherhood would be like and how it would change me, but here are some highlights:
  • Your house is going to no longer be clean all the time. You will find handprints on your stainless steel appliances, one Cheerios on the laundry room floor, and drool on the back door glass from your kid putting his face on it...and that's okay. It's okay to let the laundry go and spend time with your baby instead. One day when you look back, you won't remember the times you spent folding laundry; you're going to remember the time you spent with your child. 
  • You won't pee alone for a while. Whether it's your child, your animal, or your husband in the bathroom - just embrace it. One day, you'll pee alone again. But until then...
  • Your child will be the one throwing a massive temper tantrum in the lawn and garden aisle of Target. So don't give that woman whose kid is doing it now a side-eye; you'll have your turn one day. And you're going to want to side-eye the girl side-eyeing you!
  • You're going to have things come out of your mouth and you'll say, "Oh my gosh, I sound just like my mother." And then you'll laugh and smile because you now understand why she said what she did. 
  • You will say your child's name no less than 100 times a day. "Walker, Walker? Walker? Walker! WALKER!" 
  • Things will go missing and you'll find them in the most random of locations. A wooden car in the refrigerator? Your remote control in the trash can? Your kid's hairbrush in the china cabinet drawer? Why not?
  • The "mama bear" instinct is real. You will be so fiercely protective of your child that it will surprise you. 
  • You can't pray over them and for them enough. The world out there is a big, scary one, and these sweet babies need their mama {and daddy} praying for them. 
  • You will go to the doctor when your child is sick looking like the Hot Mess Express just rolled into town. But if an 8 a.m. doctor's appointment is all that's available and you've yet to brush your teeth from being up with them sick all night? Just roll with it. I always tell myself they've seen worse. {Or so I hope.}
  • Things that were a big deal pre-children aren't as big of a deal post-children. Somehow, some way - and I can't explain it - these little people make other things seem small in comparison.
  • Your boobs will never be the same. You'll stare in envy at pictures of yourself from college in bathing suits and sigh heavily, wondering exactly how much a boob lift would cost and if it really hurts that bad. {Terry Dubrow, are you reading?}
  • Phantom baby cries are real. You'll be dead to the world asleep and think you hear a cry, only to check the monitor and your child is sleeping like, well, a baby. It's seriously so creepy -slash- makes you wonder if you're living in a haunted house.
  • You will laugh at how much you'd rather shop for them than yourself sometimes. 
  • Motherhood is hard. Whether you choose to work or stay home, both aspects of motherhood are tough. But it's the most rewarding job you'll ever have. Seeing your child sign "please" or finally master that puzzle they've been working on for a month? It will bring you greater joy {in the most different of ways} than landing a big contract at work ever did.
  • You won't realize how much you're going to love this tiny person. You made them; you carried them; you birthed them; you raised them. And the immense amount of love you will feel for them will be completely unexplainable. 
Yes, being a mom has changed me; and personally, I think for the better. Am I a crazy, cry-at-Johnson & Johnson commercials-mama-bear-protective-tired mama? As Sarah Palin said, "You betcha!" But becoming a mom has made me so much more appreciative of my mom and allowed me to see that motherhood does change you, but man, is it worth it. 

Linking up with Annie and Natalie 

7 comments:

  1. Those phantom-cries! I thought I was the only one!!

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  2. Beautiful post!! So crazy how much our lives have changed, and our world turned upside down - and yet, I wouldn't change it for anything!

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  3. This is all so true! From the OCD compulsively clean home that is now riddled with toys, art and lots and lots of glitter to showing up at the doctor looking like someone from HoneyBooBoo ;-) And the boobs. So much. Peeing alone is a foreign concept in our house too. My chickies use it as prime opportunity to come in and tell me all the things. It ends up not so bad as weird as that sounds! I swear they tell me more while I am in the bath or peeing than they do at any other time. HA!

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  4. I completely agree, I actually just wrote a post about being a working mom. Being a mom has certainly changed me in more ways than one. I've never been more grateful for my mom than I ever have after giving birth.

    Liz → sundays with sophie

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  5. What a beautiful post - everything we love about being a momma x

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  6. Love this post! So true!! Its like you took the words out of mouth haha!

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